A request for better ladysmut

By THOMAS F. JOHNSON

“Twilight” and its incompetent ilk occupy the same purpose for women as porn for men.

Think about it: The “Twilight” vampire saga is a story about two exquisitely sculpted men for the reader to lust over. The protagonist is so bland that any reader can insert herself into her shoes.

The plotline throws out any notion of female empowerment in favor of pure fetish fuel. This could also aptly describe about any porn film I can think of.

The sadomasochistic best-selling novel “50 Shades of Grey” is even more blatant about its perverted goals and deranged gender politics. It replaces stalking with flat-out rape.

The same criticism applies to a huge chunk of Harlequin Romance and all its squirming half-progeny.

Now, I’m not offended by the fact that these books are porn. I’m offended that they are poorly written and too ashamed of their pornographic nature to admit that they’re porn.

Society keeps telling women that porn can only be enjoyed by men and is inherently misogynistic.

Therefore, when women want or find material that gets them hot they have to camouflage it as “erotica” or “the greatest love story ever told,” instead of calling it what it is.

And when women have to hide their sexualities like that, schlockmeisters and hacks like Stephanie Meyer have room to move in and dominate the market.

Some comic books aimed at men, like Adam Warren’s “Empowered” and Phil Foglio’s “XXXenophile,” show that wank material can be written with a quality plot and good characterization.

And the female audience for porn is there. The fact that the Internet is filled with enough slash-fic & yaoi to deforest North America if it were ever printed gives proof to this.

So why can’t more competent authors start writing filthy stories for women about ab-tacular spawn of Yog-Sototh or licking whipped cream off a sexy radioactive mutant’s nipples?

And if those authors already exist, why don’t we hear more about them?

Johnson wishes that somebody would write a sexy Cthulhu Mythos novel. Alan Moore’s “Necronomicon” does not count.

Filed Under: Opinion

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